Ten Mark Wahlberg quotes – from 9/11 to George Clooney

Kristian20 via Flickr

We've read about tough guy Mark Wahlberg's apology about his 9/11 quote, so I thought it would be a good time to have a look at Marky Mark's other bits of wisdom:

•In case you missed it Marky on 9/11: "If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn't have went down like it did." 


•"All that running around in my underwear put money in my pockets. I can focus on working in interesting movies without having to worry about supporting myself." 


•"Clooney is just a pretty boy, man, and that's it, OK? I carried him on my back long enough. I'm on my own." 


•"I have more money now than I know what to do with." 


•"I never lie. I believe everything I say, so it's not a lie." 


•"When I was a rapper, the groupies didn't have to try too hard with me. Just show up at the hotel." 


•"Immortality... Is that a super power?" 


•"He's a legend and I respect his work, so I went down and paid my respects when Charlton was on the set. He was nice but I think he lied a little. He said it was an honour to be in a movie with me, but I don't believe it." 


•"I'm trying to work as hard as possible to be the best person I can be, to everybody. I mean, my faith and the love that I have in my heart is something that I want to share and spread." 


•"Hockey is probably one of the most expensive sports. You have to have a place to play. You have to have the proper equipment. You have to have the transportation to get there."

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Ten viral videos you must see including drunk woman at office party

This is a video list put together by BuzzFeed, featuring ten must see items. I'll start the ball rolling with number one: The drunken girl at the office party. Been there, seen that? Probably at one time or another in your life you'll have encountered something similar. The real tough part for the woman in the video must have been the next day. Video hangover.

 

See the complete list on BuzzFeed here.

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Five crazy things found in people's rectums

1. This week police in North Carolina found a 10 inch gun hidden in a prisoner  Michael Leon Ward's  bum. An initial strip search failed to find the weapon. The gun was not loaded, but was in working condition. No word on where he hid the bullets.

2. A 60-year-old man told authorities that thieves shoved entire Coca-cola bottle in backside.  Let's hope he didn't waste this on a lame diet Coke.

3.  Maybe you remember the Seinfeld episode where George's father ends up with a pasta statue up his rear. This is life imitating TV. A Georgia lawyer claimed he was showering with his cell phone and managed to slip and fall and land right on top on his ringing cell phone. He's not taking any calls at the moment!

4.  The kitchen sink approach: This Florida man packed 17 Oxycodone pills, 1 cigarette, 6 matches, 1 flint, 1 empty syringe with an eraser over the needle part, 1 lip balm container, 1 condom, 1 CVS receipt, and a coupon. I guess he forgot the car at home,

5. This woman in the Netherlands either ingested an entire giant squid, or madame, you have an entire set of cutlery up you ass! Indeed she did. Obviously planning a dinner party.

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Ten things you have to admire about the French

Oh, the French! We saved their asses in two world wars and they turn their noses to the sky when we walk by. We love to hate them, and hate to love them. There are things they should be admired for, however. Here are a few of them:

1. They taught us that you can be short and be the leader of a first world country. Think Napoleon and Nicholas Sarkozy. The latter gained some press for having tall men removed from his security detail, a very Nepoleanish move. As a bonus, but you can score a hot babe to keep you company in the palace – think Carla Bruni.

Sarkozy and Carla

2. France, which seems to be perpetually on vacation or strike, has emerged as one of two economic strongholds in western Europe, although this is more a sad  indicator of the rest of the EU's weakness than France's strength.

3. The Eiffel Tower.

4. They are superb gift givers, as in the Statue of Liberty. This generous gift was given to the U.S. in 1886 by the people of France, is surely one of the world's best presents, ever.

5. The French Poodle. Considered the second most intelligent dog in the world, (the border collie claims first place place in the brains department), this dog is almost smart enough to run the EU. It's a great watch dog, chauffeur and all-around pet.

6. Food. Forget about Paul Boscue and the Michelin starred restaurants and think about "steak-frites". French fries alone should earn your admiration, although it's questionable if their origin is actually French. I'll throw in French Toast just to round out the argument.

7. Wine. From the cellars of over-priced Bordeaux to the vineyards of Champagne, the French are the true kings of the wine industry. They taught us that a single bottle of wine can command thousands of dollars and even bad vintages of first growth houses will be sought after. American Robert Parker may have brought them down a couple notches, but let's face it, they have mastered the art of wine making and marketing better than most of the world.

8. Language. Aside from an upper class British accent, listening to well spoken French is delightful, even if we cannot understand a word of it.

9. Sex. The French ooze sexuality and have none of the puritanical hold backs that confine North Americans. Their women are sensuous, they know how to dress and presumably undress.

Brigitte Bardot back when she was a godess

10. They think Woody Allen is a god. Really.

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List: Five smartest porn stars

Direct from the great folks at RANKER (list and words),  here's a short list of a few porn stars with IQs well above room temperature: 

•  "Asia Carrera studied piano as a child and she performed at Carnegie Hall twice before she turned 15. She's starred in over 275 adult films in her career  and has as IQ of 156. She also attended Rutgers University from which she earned a full scholarship, where she double-majored in Business and Japanese." 

• "Annie Sprinkle is the first porn star known to have earned a Ph.D. She earned her doctorate in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, California."

• "Shy Love has starred in over 250 adult films during her career. She graduated high school at the age of 16, then earned a bachelor's degree and two Masters Degrees. She received her Bachelor's degree in Accounting, then went of to get  her Master's Degree in Accounting immediately afterward. Soon after, she became the comptroller of a multi-national pet pharmaceutical company in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. And during her employment there, she found the time to take night classes to earn her second Master's Degree in Taxation."

• "Lorelei Lee, 28, is a well known porn star who has managed being a student and adult film star for almost 10 years. She is a 2008 graduate from San Francisco State University andenrolled at NYU's creative writing program. Despite much criticism, she continues to juggle both her adult professional career AND her grueling academic duties/schedule."

•  "Nina Hartley started working in strip clubs during her sophomore year of nursing school to support herself. She graduated magna cum laudefrom San Francisco State University's nursing school, and is a registered nurse."

Read the complete list of 13 brainy porn stars on RANKER. 

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