The Cry Baby is on sabbatical ....

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Best quotes: The wit and wisdom of Silvio Berlusconi

Credit: Wikipedia
Silvio Berlusconi is gone (for the moment at least) after cavorting in Italian politics for 17 years. Like most politicians, Berlusconi loved to talk, perhaps without the filter that most others employ. Here's a few of his more memorable quotes:

“As always, I work without interruption and if occasionally I happen to look a beautiful girl in the face, it’s better to like beautiful girls than to be gay.”

While visiting survivors of the earthquake in Abruzzo, who were living in emergency tents: “They should look at it as a weekend of camping.”

On American president Obama: “Handsome, young and also suntanned.”

“I am the Jesus Christ of politics. I am a patient victim, I put up with everyone, I sacrifice myself for everyone.”

“Only Napoleon did more than I have done, but I am definitely taller.”

“Mussolini never killed anyone. Mussolini sent people on holiday in exile.”

To socialist German lawmaker Martin Schulz: “Mr. Schulz, I know there is in Italy a man producing a film on the Nazi concentration camps. I would like to suggest you for the role of Kapo. You’d be perfect.”

From a wiretapped conversation referring to a line of young women outside his door he reports: “... doing only eight girls, because I couldn’t do more.”

Adios Silvio!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Naked basketball player goes on rampage

Credit: Fresno Police
The phrase "Let's get naked" is part of the lexicon in the 'How to Party at College' handbook that I assume every student somehow receives upon beginning their higher education. The phrase "Naked Rampage" appears to be a new entry.

After being cut from the Fresno Pacific University basketball team, 21-year-old student Leonard Tyrell Young followed the first part of the handbook and "got naked". So far so good. Unfortunately, Young wend on to assault two women, attempt to steal a police car, and attack a police officer and his dog – all while naked.

 Police had to use a Taser to bring down the six-foot naked basketball player. Apparently, Young had been dismissed from the team for "a violation of team standards."

In case you are wondering, drug use was a factor – page one of he handbook. Young is being held on suspicion of carjacking, resisting arrest, vandalism, harming a police dog and being under the influence of a controlled substance.

 Read more here.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Jesse Ventura moving to Mexico? Maybe ... check out some of our favourite Jesse quotes

Credit: Wikipedia
You may have heard that Jesse Ventura is contemplating a move to Mexico after his lawsuit against the government for illegal search at airports was dismissed. Ventura has had problems with airport security because of a titanium hip implant that sets the metal detectors on high alert. Can't blame him for being pissed, but a move to the kinder, gentler Mexico just might not be the best of moves, even given his colourful past. Jesse has been a Navy Seal, wreslter, a mayor and a governor, just to mention a few of his careers.

 Time to take a look at some of Jesse's more memorable quotes:

Congratulations, you have a sense of humor. 

And to those who didn't: Go stick your head in the mud. If I wanna be president, I probably can. I also believe that government has no business telling us how we should live our lives.

 I think our lifestyle choices should be left up to us. What we do in our private lives is none of the government's business. That position rules out the Republican Party for me.

 I asked Dalai Lama the most important question that I think you could ask - if he had ever seen Caddyshack.

 I decided to run for governor because I got mad... I want to make government more directly accountable to the people. 

 I speak my mind. If it offends some people, well, there's not much I can do about that. But I'm going to be honest. I'm going to continue to speak my mind, and that's who I am. 

 If I could be reincarnated as a fabric, I would come back as a 38 double-D bra.

 Industrial hemp is a very useful plant. I challenged the attorney general to get rid of the criminal stigma associated with hemp so we can look at it in terms of how it might be useful.

.If you were to come to Minnesota, I could have you locked up like that. That's power. 

 Wrestling is ballet with violence. War isn't civilized. War is failure. It's the ultimate result of a breakdown in public policy and soldiers are the machines that handle that breakdown. In warfare, you're taught to do whatever you have to, to stay alive. 

 Even while I was a Navy SEAL, I participated in the 1970s peace movement. I marched at peace rallies. I admit it wasn't so much because of my great love of peace as it was because of my great love of female companionship. To the women in the movement, I was the poor beleaguered victim of the system, sent off against his will to fight this horrible war. They didn't realize that the navy had no draft! 

 I'm not disparaging suicides when I call them weak, I'm pointing out that anybody who would consider doing a thing like that needs help. I don't think a normal, mentally healthy person commits suicide. Of course, there are exceptions; people who are terminally ill are a different issue. But in the vast majority of cases, suicide is a tragedy that does unbelievable damage to the family and friends the suicide leaves behind. You don't want to encourage people to do such a thing.

 I looked at my wife and said, "You know what? If these people put their own dollar-an-hour raise above the integrity of our nation, I don't wanna be their boss anymore."

 Whenever you take a stand on an issue, people will line up around the block to kick your ass over it. By having an opinion, you make yourself a target. Why do you think Congress likes to hide behind closed doors at decision-making time?

Need more quotes? Read more here.

Mitt Romney will be the next U.S. president

Credit: Wikipedia
Let me say this right off – I like Herman Cain. My reasons for liking him might be different from those that applaud his 9-9-9 taxation plan or his overly simplistic views on economic issues. I like him because he actually answers questions. While the other candidates dance the dance of words when asked direct questions in a debate, Cain will answer the question, yes actually answer the  question, in plain, clear language. The problem with Cain is simply his lack of political experience. His views have become somewhat more inconsistent as the level of scrutiny has increased with his popularity. A more experienced politician knows how to bait and switch with more skill than Cain has shown. The handling of his roaming stance on abortion is a prime example.

Enter the chameleon Mitt Romney. Friend of the gays? Maybe. Maybe not. He's been able to play it both ways with great success. Tea Party supporter? Who knows. A one point he took great care to distance himself from them, but lately has been snuggling up to them, as the political winds appear to be shifting that way, a la Herman Cain. Health care? Again, who can really tell since he brought in government health care in Massachusetts, only to condemn the program later, albeit blaming the Democrats for its mismanagement.

The question is: Will America elect a waffler Romney? The answer is yes. With Obama imploding on his lack of ability to deal with economic and military issues, the country is looking for a change. I've left out the rest of the Republican candidates, because I simply do not see them as having any hope of actually becoming the party candidate. It's Romney's track record of selling his changing viewpoints that actually will get him elected. He's a skilled and charismatic politician, with the depth of experience to know how the political world works.

In the end,  the election for president is largely one of personality cult and the ability to craft it. Like it or not, Romney has this worked out to the nth degree. He has the ability to craft his image to fit the current electable mold, to a much greater degree than his competition.

Ladies and gentlemen: President Mitt Romney.

P.S.   One might ask "What about the religion factor?" There is an issue with the big "M" in the room that doesn't stand for Mitt. Are Americans ready for a Mormon president? I believe it will be overlooked in the end. The focus on religion in the U.S. presidential race has always perplexed me. As a true non-believer, I have always thought religion has no place in politics. I find the Mormon doctrine and history to be totally bizarre, but then I find that most religions fall in this category. The biggest strike against the Mormon religion appears to be it's more recent incarnation. Just keep your religion in your pants Mitt and you'll be alright.